How To Pick Yourself Up When You Get Knocked Down

Have you ever been knocked down in your life? In other words, have you ever failed in your life? I know I have, I have failed multiple times. I failed at getting what I thought I wanted  and most importantly I failed by succeeding in something I didn’t really want. The point is that I have failed. Have you ever failed? If so, read on. In this article you will discover tools that will help you deal with any failure in your life and pick yourself up when you are knocked down.

Realize That You Were Knocked Down

Believe it or not, that is and was the most difficult part for me in the road to recovery from a knock down. Multiple times I would fail to realize that I even failed.  I understand that most of the time we realize that things are not going our way, but we fail to take responsibility for that failure ourselves. After an unsuccessful interview, I would sometimes blame the people interviewing not seeing my true worth; after failing to do the best that I could on a test or a project, I would blame the outside circumstances for my “failure”. In short, I would not see those setbacks as my failures, I would see it as series of unfortunate events that brought around the failure and that it was not my fault.

Understand Why You Were Knocked Down

Once you take the responsibility for your own failure, you can try to understand why you failed. There are conscious and subconscious reasons for it. For the purposes of this article let us look at the example of applying and getting jobs.  First, we will look at scenario where a person is rejected from a job that he thought he wanted. Second, we will examine a scenario where a person got the job, which he didn’t really want. Then, we will look at how each of those scenarios presents an opportunity for growth.

You Did Not Get What You Wanted

Most of us have been in this situation where our “dream job” escaped our grasp for a reason unknown to us.  The possible conscious reasons for not getting the job might be as simple as not being qualified, inadequate preparation for the interview, incompatibility with the firm’s culture, being late, having a cell phone go off during the interview, etc. All of the above reasons where something you could control, yet you did not. Why? The answer usually lies in the subconscious reasons for you doing those things. The number one reason for coming to the interview unprepared is really not wanting the job to begin with.  If you really wanted to get your dream job, you would have actually came in prepared at your best and would have planned for any unexpected events. If you didn’t, then you have only yourself to blame and actually thank the interviewer for being savvy enough to realize that you didn’t want to the job to begin with.

Where do the conclusions above take us? They make us rethink and reevaluate our lives and be grateful for not getting what you want. You can read more about the benefits of being unemployed here.

You Did Get What You Really Did Not Want

Many more of us find ourselves doing things that we do not like and questioning how we got there to begin with. We can blame ourselves for getting the job that we really did not want on our great interviewing (self-deception) skills; or we can blame it on a very inexperienced interviewer that did not catch on to clues that should reveal our true intentions when applying for the job.

Let us know image, that we have the job that we hate.  One possible view on the situation is the following: “I will put up with this terrible job for as long is I can and just do the least amount of work possible just to get by”. I can guarantee you that this attitude will not get you anywhere in life because it will not help you progress to become the person that you want to be.

Another possible view, a healthier view in my mind, on the situation is the following: “I know that what I am doing is not for me and I really do not like this job, however, I understand that even in this situation I can learn something that will help me to become the person that I want to be”. Using this approach, you would be able to get a positive experience out of an unpleasant job. You can work on transferable skills. For example, you know that you need to work on your communication or people skills or that you need some managerial experience. Almost every job that you will ever do will contain opportunities to work on the above mentioned skills. In general, no matter how unplesant the job is, you can always find ways to make it work for you. That is how you pick yourself up.

Picking Yourself Up

After understanding why you were knocked down to begin with, you will find yourself seeing abundant opportunities to learn and grow to become the person that you want o be. Even if you catch yourself doing the work that you do not like, you will know that you are not working because of money, but because you want to learn and improve upon a particular skill. Such view will empower you and help you keep going through life because you will find opportunities in every failure. Yet, the above is just the part of the story.

Leading a Multidimensional Life

Sometimes, the blows in life are very devastating and it takes a long time to realize that you were knocked down and even long to realize why it exactly happened. What do you do then? The answer is to have a multidimensional life. What does that mean exactly? It means not putting all of your eggs in the same basket. It means having a variety of interests, a variety of passions and areas where you want to grow in. For example, if you cannot get a job, you can still work on improving yourself, your relationships with others, you can read, you can learn other languages, you can pick up or continue working on a hobby. If your relationships are not going too well, then you dedicate and redirect negative energy to meditation, self improvement, etc.

The point is to create an amazing story for yourself and understand that just because one area of your life is not going as planned, your whole life does not have to come down crumbling on you. If you ever find yourself in situation where one particular area means much more than others, then you will know that you need to expand your horizons and redirect your energy.