I deleted my facebook account. Pretty much sums it up. It is pretty simple to do, once you find the link that you need.

I deleted my facebook account and I feel great. One simple reason: I realized I had no use for it. I realized that as I was talking to my brother. It just suddenly dawned upon me that I was just mindlessly wasting my time on this social network. I realized that I never really needed facebook. Many people quote that in “this increasingly busy” world it is harder and harder to stay connected with people. That is what they say. They also say that it is almost a necessity to have facebook.

I disagree.

Facebook is and always was a cheap substitute to real communication. Instead of calling somebody and saying “Hi” we stalk them on facebook and leave a 5 second comment here and there. Instead of meeting our “friends” in person and sharing the experience of a journey, we just put the pictures up on facebook and let others click through them. Instead of sending a personal invite or an actual gift, we send electronic invites and electronic gifts (which costs money!). Instead of asking a girl/guy out in person or over the phone, we instead “poke” them on facebook. Instead of calling somebody to wish a Happy Birthday we just leave a wall post. Instead …

This could on forever. The point is this: facebook encourages superficial and insincere communication. So what that we have hundreds of friends on facebook. Do we really keep in touch with them all? Do our “friends” just become another news feed item that gets lost amongst a hundred others? In the end, you are just cheating yourself.

What about the emotional energy that you spend over facebook: the privacy settings, the changing user interface, the dislike button and so on. Is it really worth spending your time and energy being upset about those things? And what about reading those overly negative status updates of people you barely know? What about people fighting over their relationship status on facebook? What about losing jobs over something you did or said over facebook? What about the possiblity of you being harassed by a criminal?

I had enough of that and that is why I decided to delete my account.

Now, I do not have to worry about either of those things. Now, I will know who my true friends are because they will call me or send me an e-mail if they will want to meet up. It’s a great way to eliminate dead-weight from your life. People have and always will appreciate a call, a sincere letter or an e-mail. Sure, we can all say that we are “increasingly busy”, but to me that’s bunch of nonsense.

If you do not have enough time to stay in touch with your friends through a phone call or an in person meeting, then you might have you priorities all wrong in your life. Think about it. Since when did relationships were pushed back into the background of our “busy” lives? It’s time to change that and remember what matters and ditch the deceptively “useful” technological tools.

If you want to establish a presence online and still keep your private life private, then there are plenty of other tools to consider. For your professional career, you might want to consider joining LinkedIn and as a tool for your personal expression and creativity consider blogging. Using only those two powerful tools, you will be able to create a strong and powerful image of yourself online, while keeping your private life private and your relationships deep.

I am sure some of you find facebook extremely useful and that is fine. The point here is to become aware of how the use of technology is affecting your life and really deciding if it is right for you.

Question: Do you have a facebook?

Are you about to enroll in a four-year institution? Are you currently attending one? Are you considering going to a university? If so, then you might to read on.

I spent five years at the university. Yet, I still do not have a job that I think I rightfully deserve. I spent countless hours trying to figure out what went wrong. In the process, I pinpointed key mistakes that I made and valuable lessons that I learned which I would love to share with the rest of you today.

Know Why

Know why you are going to a four-year institution. I know. I sound like a billion other people out there, but it is in your best interest to read on instead of just rolling your eyes at me. Let me explain why.

Think about the following. Today we have the world’s knowledge readily available. All you have to do is open up your laptop, enter your favorite search engine’s name, and search away. The only real issue is that you have to know what you are looking for. Otherwise, the world’s collective knowledge will be useless to you.

Same goes for college.

With that in mind, take out a piece of paper and write down “Why am I going to college?” at the top of the page. Then spend some quality answering that question. It might take a couple of minutes, hour, or days. However, it will be all worth it if you are able to answer the question concretely.

Even if you write down “I want to figure out what to do with my life,” then you are on the right track. However, if you are drawing a blank, then you might seriously need to reconsider committing to this four-year relationship.

Eliminate Distractions

If you were able to pinpoint the exact reason as to why you want to go to college then you are half way done. The next step is to eliminate all distractions, which would otherwise prevent you from achieving your goal.

There will be plenty of them. Some of the distractions are excessive drinking, drug abuse, overwhelming social life, sex, general laziness, video and drinking games, destructive relationships, and just doing dumb things because you can. That is only a partial list.

Simply put, you will be overwhelmed with freedom because there will be nobody to there to tell you no. Unless you get too crazy and get kicked out of the university.

I am not saying that you should avoid all having fun. Yet, know where to draw the line by reminding yourself why you are here. Do not let “fun” keep you from accomplishing your goals. Also, keep in mind that many – if not all – destructive habits that you form in college will stay with you for the rest of your life.

Purposeful engagement

Practice purposeful engagement. Let us assume that you were able to keep those distractions to a minimum. After that, comes the most important part of all. I call it purposeful engagement. It is just a fancy way of say to know why you are doing what you doing.

Tell everybody what you want to do and why you are here in college. People will talk about you and many opportunities and resources will open up to you just because of that. If you tell people that you do not know what you want to do, then nobody will know how to help you.

Get to know your professors. Unfortunately, I made the above mistake. NOT talking to your professors and NOT making friends with them is simply DUMB. Besides the fact that they are expert in their field, they are very well connected with professionals in your field, can write a recommendation letters when you need one, guide you in the right direction and just be your friend. This is the single most important thing you should do in college.

Join related student and social organizations. If I forgot to mention it, then here it is: college is all about networking. Get to meet as many people in your field as possible and become friends with them. Many of them will become professionals once they graduate. You can never know too many people in this world. You might want to start a business one day. When that day comes, you will know where to turn to and who to look for.

Grades do not matter that much, unless you are planning to go to a top-notch graduate school after your undergraduate studies. If you are able to maintain a GPA above 3.3, then you are in a good shape. Once you are looking for employment, GPA will be something your employers will look at only once and then they will focus on your skills, your communication ability, teamwork, leadership, and personality. So yes, GPA is overrated, focus on networking, gaining experience and exposure.

Stay focused

You will get sidetracked. It is a fact. It is fine to let go sometimes and not worry about your future. Just do not make it a habit. Remind yourself of what your purpose was for coming to school and keep going. It will help you have a much more pleasant and rewarding college experience.

However, if you cannot get back into the rhythm, then it might be important to reconsider the reason as to why you went to college. I know I changed my major multiple times. Just accept it as a life fact: you will change throughout life.

Your priorities and desires will change; your experience will force you to reexamine your old beliefs and will help you form new ones. Just accept it. Change things accordingly and move on. One thing you do not want to do is to be stuck doing something you hate. Make the switch early and save yourself tons of trouble later in life.

How important is money to you? What does it mean to you? How much time in your day do you spend worrying about money? Is being rich one of your goals in life? Do you know why?

These are all important questions that you should answer for yourself.

I have come to the following conclusions in my quest to understand the world of finance:

• Money is not real
• Money is a side effect of living your purpose of life
• Rich is a state of mind
• Money reflects value
• Money is a tool, it is means to an end, not vice versa

All of the above conclusions have lead to understand that worrying about money is pretty silly. I am not mocking people who are struggling financially. I am just saying that many people are focused on the wrong issue. Most people are unhappy because they have the means and the ends confused. If you continue worrying about acquiring more money, then you will end up leading a poor life. I can almost say that with certainty.

If you should not focus on money, then what is it that should focus on? You need to focus on the real source of wealth, which gives rise to wealth. You should focus on creating genuine value in your life.  Worry about that. Try and figure out a way how you can create value for others. That is the true source of wealth – value.

How does that help? Here is how. If you focus on creating genuine value for others, then you will just know that riches are surely to follow soon after. With that in mind, you won’t have to worry if the economy is rising or falling, or if the dollar is becoming stronger or weaker. You won’t even have to worry if you lose your house or your savings because you will always now that you have never lost the source of that wealth: yourself.

You are the biggest asset in your life and you should invest the most time and effort into fine tuning your ability to create value.

The big question, then is not how to get more money, but how to create more value. So, how do you create value?

1. Understand yourself. You should be the person who knows you the best inside out. That will require time and effort. It will require you knowing what you like and what you dislike. You will have to figure out what drives you and what depresses you. You will have to know your strengths and your weakness. Only by understanding yourself, you will be able leverage your strengths and your passions to figure out where you fit in the world. Moreover, you will be able to figure out your underlying purpose in life.

2. Follow your life purpose. With a clear image of where you want to go in life, you will naturally dedicate yourself to your ideal and become and expert at what you are trying do in life. If you try and do anything else but what you absolutely love, then your whole being will resist  and it will ultimately lead to unhappiness and poor life. If you follow your passion, then you will just know what to do and where to go. You will able to make choices and decisions so much easier. There will be a clear distinction in what you need and do not need in your life.

That is all there is too it. Surprised? You should be.

I was going to write more about transferable skills, marketing and branding and so on. Yet, it does not really matter. It does not matter if you understand what rich or wealthy and poor really mean. They have little to do with money. Remember, correlation does not imply causation! Rich and poor are simply states of mind.

Being rich means doing all the things that you always wanted to in your life. What else could anybody really want in life? After all, even those who acquire a lot of money, what do they do with it? They usually spend it doing the things that they want to do. It might be going on vacations, spending time with the family or learning something. Yet, it is crucial to understand: you don’t need to be rich dollar wise to do the things that you enjoy.

All you need to do is make the right decisions by understanding yourself and following your life purpose. That is the real difference between the true rich and the true poor. With these new definitions of rich and poor, reread the article and see if it makes more sense now. Go ahead and do it. It might change your life.

With that in mind, this would be a more appropriate picture:

QUESTION: Are you still worried about money?

_____________________

Image (top): Delox – Martin Deák

Image (bottom): dotbenjamin

After a while, I just get bored of some things. I do.

I get bored hearing about the same old issues and problems and people never doing anything about them. If I had a TV show and I had a segment called “What Grinds My Gears”, people with never ending same old issues would be on that segment. No doubt!

What grinds my gears even more is the excuse that the same people use: “Well, you know…my life just kind of got in the way! You know how it is!” And then they would go on babbling about work, family, kids, homework, “rough” weekends and so on. Yea, I understood it. I understood a while ago. But then I stopped understanding because the same people would end up talking to me again, telling me how the life got in the way.

Yuk.

I used to be one of those people. I know – GROSS!

Thankfully, I stopped. I got tired of hearing myself complain about the same old things, trying to resolve issues or achieve new goals, but then end up seeing “life getting in the way”! So I did three things: 1) I shut my mouth 2)took responsibility away from “life” onto myself 3)looked for ways to create a life which would help me solve my issues. Matter of fact, to this I try not ever to share any negative news with other people. I just deal with them on my own. If I do reach out, it is just to ask for advice, but not to whine to them about my problems.

So, what about you? Does your life get in the way? Do you want to:

• get a new job
• lose weight
• go on a vacation
• wake up early
• start working out
• start saving money
• read a book
• learn something new
• go live in a new country
• go skydiving
• learn to dance
• start dating

Well, do you? Have you tried achieving any of those things, but then life just got in the way?I am sorry, but I have no pity for you.

Life just does not get in the way, you let it.

How? Simple; you probably make dumb decisions and instead of taking the responsibility on your own shoulders, you just blame life for getting in the way.

Let’s take a look at somebody who wants to start working out. He makes it his New Year’s resolution: “I am going to go to the gym four days a week: Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday.” Right on! The first week goes by, he is still at it. The second week gets tougher, but he still pushes on. Then, the third week comes around. Not so good. He started missing his workouts and before he knew it, he stopped working out all together.

Friends: ” What happened, man?”

Him: “You know. Life just kind of got in the way.”

Friends: “What do you mean?”

Him: “You know. The work started to kick in. I have to work late and then after work I don’t want to do anything. My brain is fried!”

Friends: “Right…”

Him: “Yea! I just couldn’t keep up. You know how hard it is, right?

Friends: “Yea!”

Him: “Then I have to watch my favorite shows and then I have to go out with my friends, socialize, etc. And then, I have to run all of these errands! So, I just said screw this! I want to have a normal life, so I stopped. Maybe next year I won’t be as busy with life.”

Friends: “Yea, man. You will have your chance!”

Just writing that, brought back unpleasant memories.

If life gets in the way, then it is all your fault, because you have created the life that you have. Furthermore, if you let life get in the way, then you probably do not want to solve an issue or achieve a goal bad enough.

That is all there is to it.

Just admit that to yourself. Admit it! If it is something that REALLY is bothering you, then do something about it in way that won’t let your life get in the way. Oh, I almost forgot. Here is how:

• Shut up. Stop complaining to others about how hard you try and how life just gets in the way. Nobody cares. You just waste your own time and others. Instead, if you are going to talk to somebody about your issues, be precise. State the issue and ask for advice of how to accomplish it. Consider the advice and try putting it into action. If it doesn’t work, move onto something different.

• Take responsibility. Life is never at fault. You are responsible for your life. You make the decisions that get you were you are right now. This might be a really hard thing to do. Taking responsibility is never easy, but this will put the control back into your hands. Life will not, randomly, get in your way. You will be able to look at yourself and look for the best ways to solve this problem. So, empower yourself by taking responsibility.

• Reorganize your life. If you have done the above steps, then you will realize that much work needs to be done. It might be simply summed up in the following: eliminate what you do not like and start doing what you like. It will have something to do with eliminating negative habits, people, environments, or things that “prevent” you from doing what you want. It will be hard, but you can do it. After that, you will have all of this free time to fill with things that you want to do. Just make sure, they are the things that you really want to do. This process will be pointless if you will have no real reasons for doing any of the things you said you wanted to do. Simple fact is that some people are just too comfortable with their lives to change anything about them.

So next time you hear yourself or your friends saying that life got in their way, just smack them on the head and tell them to take the responsibility to their own hands! Or just send them to this blog for some verbal head-smacking. Do whichever you are more comfortable with.

_______________

Image: remuz [Jack The Ripper]

Statistics And Life

Thinking of statistics reminds of college. Stats were all about numbers and other dry “stuff” that had little relevance to anything important in life. That’s what I thought at the time. Yet, I am increasingly more intrigued by what statistics can show us and teach us about life.

I am not going to write about how awesome statistics is and how everybody should study it to understand life better, but I am going to share one thing that could change the way you see the world once and for all:

Correlation does not imply causation.

That’s it – correlation does not imply causation. Let it sink in for a minute.

Many people tend to think that correlation implies causation. Such manner of thinking is subconscious most of the time, yet  we have problems such as racism, xenophobia, sexism and many other isms that give rise to prejudice and judgment precisely because of that. It is because of that misunderstanding that many of us carry negative mental images of events, peoples, cultures and so on, which prevent us from openly interacting with those different from us. This is why we form stereotypes.

I am going to show you how understanding this simple statement: “Correlation does not imply causation” can help you rid your life of stereotypes once and for all. That statement on it’s own is the antidote for the poison of bias and judgment that runs wild in our world.

However, first, we must understand how stereotypes are formed in order to be able to apply the antidote.

How Stereotypes Are Formed

Our brain is mostly to blame for the formation of stereotypes in our mind.

Our brain has to process unfathomable amount of information during the day. It cannot possible understand it all because of the limited capacity of the brain. Even if it did, the process would take too long and would be of little benefit to us. That is why our brain comes up with certain rules or filters which kick in automatically, given a certain set of circumstances. This way our brain is trying to keep our mental capacity open for making the decisions that truly matter.

Another huge factor in formation of stereotypes is  something called information bias. If we are only exposed to a certain set of information about a particular occurrence, then our brain will receive only biased information. That will only accelerate the process of  stereotype forming.

Knowing this fact, we can easily see how the media can be used in the formation of stereotypes. The media sources can choose to form a desired stereotype in our mind by repeatedly exposing us with biased information creating associations in our minds without us even realizing.

Let us examine an example.

Let us assume that all tall people that you have ever seen in your life are basketball players. It is because you are a son or daughter of a basketball player. You are receiving biased information and over long periods of time. What happens in your head is this: all tall people are basketball players OR if you are tall then you must be a basketball player. You have formed a stereotype. You have not been exposed to enough of contradicting information for you to start doubting that all tall people are basketball players.

The above process can be easily generalized into the following observation. During my life I have experienced (I have seen, been told, heard of, etc) that people with X characteristic are Y; therefore, I will just assume that if I see a person with X characteristic, he will have a Y feature.

You can see how the above process easily gives rise racism, sexism, xenophobia and numerous other misjudgments about people.  That easily happens, if we are not aware of the fact that correlation does not imply causation.

The Cure

Let us revisit the example with the basketball players. Before you were introduced to the idea that correlation does not imply causation, you thought that all tall people are basketball players.

Here is how you thinking would change after the introduction of the idea that correlation does not imply causation. You would think the following: “Even though, all tall people I have seen in my life are basketball players, that is not necessarily the case because correlation does not imply causation. I might not have seen all of the tall people in the world for me to make this assumption. I should investigate more.”

So there you are. If you are aware of the fact that correlation does not imply causation, then you should be able to resits forming premature stereotypes about individuals, peoples, countries, associations and so on. Before jumping to conclusions ask yourself this: “Do I have enough information to form an opinion? Or, have I been exposed only to certain information with the intent of me forming a certain view about the event or a person? How and where can I find a contradicting piece of evidence which will negate my current understanding?”

If you just remember that correlation does not imply causation, then you will open up many doors in your life because of your open mind and curiosity and absence of judgment and bias. You will enrich your life with new and unexpected connections and experiences. Happy exploring!

_______________

Image: instantatlas

People love setting goals. Not too many people achieve them. Why? I think it is because people set goals without thinking. They set them because everybody else around them is doing it. Seldom people ask: “Why do I need this goal? What will accomplishing this goal accomplish in my life?” I am going to attempt to correct this situation with this article.

Read on.

I have never set yearly goals before this year because I always had my life planned out for me: register for classes, work out, get a degree and so on. However, now that I am a free man, it makes a lot of sense to set goals. Many people call this the New Years resolution, but I just despise the word because to me it represent the epidemic of laziness. So let us just call it goals.

The key question for me was: “What type of goals do I set?”

I knew it had to do something with the purpose of life that I have defined for myself: “Evolve by consciously seeking and learning from unique value adding experiences with a purpose of becoming a positive role model.” Yet, that was too vague.

I had to narrow it down. I did not want to pick random goals without any purpose in my mind. Then I thought that I should set life long goals that would support my life’s purpose. But then, how do I know that these life long goals will not change over time? It was a bummer.

Then I remembered!

I had to choose goals that would support my core values which are aligned with my purpose of life! It all made so much sense! Values define who we are and guide us in our lives. Therefore, if I want to have a clear sense of who I am and the direction of where I am going, then I must reinforce my values. I can reinforce them by setting goals that are congruent with those values.

For example, some of my values are independence, growth and experience. As I was looking over the list of my values, I realized that I was neglecting a major value of mine: independence. The next simple step was to just think of things which would enable me to become more independent.

It was easy!

I wrote them all out. I repeated the process until I had a complete list of major purposeful goals that I want accomplish in 2010. You can do it too!

Before you start you will need two major ingredients:

• Your Purpose Of Life
• Your Core Values

Once you have those taken care of, you can easily proceed by asking yourself a simple question: “Am I living this value in my life?” If not, then you simply ask yourself: “What do I need to do to start living this value?”

It is very simple and easy easy process, but it requires a lot of set up time: coming with the purpose of your life and discovering your core values. However, once it is all said and done, you will feel great as you will know the exact direction in which you need to take your life!

Happy Exploring!

Do things for the wrong reasons to start doing things for the right reasons!

I guess you could call it unconventional wisdom, but I was never a very conventional person. My life did not turn out to be conventional. Sometimes I wish it did, but then sometimes I am grateful it did not. Since I live an unconventional life, I have some pretty unconventional experiences and thoughts. For example, I like to do the opposite; I like to confront people; I like to disregard social norms. I don’t do it on purpose, but it just so happens.

And, it just so happens that I came across this unconventional idea of doing things for the wrong reasons to start doing things for the right reasons!

Right and wrong are very illusive concepts, yet most people seem to understand them just fine. By right reasons I mean doing things because of the goodness of your heart, doing a selfless act, doing things because you should do them. By wrong reason I mean doing things for selfish reasons that benefits only you and does not have the direct benefit to the other person.

People will tell you that you should do things for the right reasons. They will tell you to do nice things to others because that is what you are supposed to do. People will tell you that you should volunteer because you will be helping others. They will tell you to treat others with respect because everybody deserves it. People will remind you not to judge others because you do not know their story! And the list goes on. Do this and do that.

Have you ever felt like you didn’t want to be nice to every person you met? Have you felt like you couldn’t care less about what you said to others? Have ever felt like all of those rules just had no meaning at all? I know I have. I rebelled against them. It was a quiet revolution. I would refuse to do the little things that I thought were just plain stupid. For example, I always felt that I was entitled to my own opinion about anything and anybody; I hated keeping my mouth shut about certain topics; I was terrible at hiding my true feelings of dissatisfaction with certain people.

Fair enough, all of those things made me seem like a very negative person and I started to see that it was affecting my social and personal life. It was a bad situation. Yet, I could not do something if I did not see the reason for doing it. Even if I did know the reason for doing something, if it did not make sense to me, I still would not act in a socially desired way.

It was up to me to make up good reasons for doing things that I should already be doing. So I did. I made up a ton of selfish reasons to do things that I did not see any reason in doing. Here are some examples:

• Socialize in order open up more opportunities for myself.
• Volunteer because it looks good on my resume
• Help others because you could ask them for favors later
• Be friendly and nice to others because you never know who knows who
• Write a blog because I can make money from it
• Etc.

And I started doing those things because of the reasons listed above. At first, it felt weird doing it and it actually did not feel right. I felt like I was cheating myself and that I was just using others. However, over time, I started realizing the actual purpose and reasons for doing things I did not see a reason to do. For example, I started being nice to all of my friends and even strangers because I know how important it is to lend a helping hand when somebody is in need and how much of a difference that can make in somebody’s life. Some might argue that helping somebody makes me feel good and that is my selfish reason for doing. Yet, I am doing things because it helps the other person and it might just be a way for nature to tell us that we are going in the right direction.

So go ahead out there and start doing things for the wrong reasons to start doing them for the right reasons! Just be aware that there is a right reason for doing things and go out with a purpose of eventually doing the right things for the right reasons.

QUESTION: Have you ever done anything for the wrong reasons to find yourself doing the same thing for the right reasons?

________________

Image: Flickr

Summary

This article will discuss how to create a Perfect Day, which will provide you with tangible daily actions that you can do every day to main your life’s stability while providing opportunities for growth at the same time. Interested? Well, read on then!

The Issue

Did you ever feel completely in control of your life? Did you feel like nothing could go wrong? But then, did you ever find yourself waking up one day into complete chaos not knowing how you got there? Did it ever feel like you had to start over once again with a process of rebuilding yourself? I have been there too many times. I was almost accepting the idea that this is how the life is – continuous reinventing of oneself.

To an extent it is true. Yet, to me it became a very tiresome process. I felt like I was starting from scratch every time! It became harder and harder to get up after being knocked down. Finally, I came up with a solution which provided me with some structure around which these reinventions would happen.

The structure had to accomplish two main goals:

• provide a foundation for stability
• provide me with opportunities for growth

Eventually, I came up with that structure. I called it the Framework For Life. However, that is all it was – a framework. I needed something more concrete. I needed to put everything into action on a daily basis. I was able to do that by packing a variety of concepts into the idea of The Perfect Day.

The Perfect Day

The Perfect Day contains a variety of interrelated concepts. I have put the Perfect Day into a formula for easier use and understanding.

The Formula.

• The Essentials + Purposeful Actions = The Perfect Day.
• The Essentials =Framework For Life Concepts = Foundation + Purpose of Life
• Purposeful Actions = Daily To Do List

The Essentials. Essentials are the goals that I need to accomplish to maintain stability and balance and my life and provide growth at the same time.

Framework For Life. I discussed the concept and the necessity for the framework for life earlier. But just to recap: framework for life requires you to simplify complex life issues into simpler ideas and concepts, which you can easier grasp. When I worked out my framework for life, it turned out that the supporting foundation of my life is made of proper rest, nutrition, physical fitness and meditation. That means I need to incorporate all of those elements into my life on a daily basis to have a healthy foundation. Even though the foundation provides stability, it does not mean that you will automatically build something amazing on top of it. You need purpose for that. With purpose you will know what to do and what resources to seek. I spent quite a bit of time until I was able to formulate the purpose of my life : “Evolve by consciously seeking and learning from unique value adding experiences with a purpose of becoming a positive role model.” I had to find a way to incorporate growth into my daily actions. Once you put the two concepts -the Essentials and Purpose of Life – together you get a list of daily goals that are going to stay constant for the rest of your life.

Purposeful Actions. These actions represent ever changing goals of your every day life. They will change every day depending on the situation. That is how they differ from the Essentials: The Essentials stay the same over your life and Purposeful Actions change daily. Purposeful Actions are in fact a simple to do list that is based on your short-term and long-term life goals. This to do list of Purposeful Actions should be made at the end of day to be incorporated into your life the next day along with the Essentials.

If you work hard enough at completing The Essentials along the Purposeful Actions, then you will have a Perfect Day! Why does that make it a Perfect Day? Here is why. You will have accomplished the following:

• Maintain your stability and balance in life by performing the actions related to the Essentials
• Acquire experiences and information related to reaching the purpose of your life
• Come a step closer to completing your short term and long term goals

Now…tell me, can a day get any better than that?

My Perfect Day

In order to put things in perspective, I will share with you how I put the above suggestions into action and created my Perfect Day!

The Essentials. My life purpose is to “Evolve by consciously seeking and learning from unique value adding experiences with a purpose of becoming a positive role model”. Proper rest, nutrition, physical fitness and meditation support my life purpose. Now I need to turn these abstract concepts into daily actions that I can keep track of. Here is the list that I came up with. You will notice a goal accompanied by an action:

• Foundation
  • Proper Rest – Wake up at 5AM; Go to Bed at 10PM; Watch my favorite shows for mental rest
  • Proper Nutrition – Eat 5 times a day; Keep track of what I eat; No Junk Food, Drink 8 glasses; Take the necessary supplements;
  • Proper Physical Fitness – Run 3 miles in the morning Mon-Fri; Lift in the afternoon; stretch on Sat and Sun
  • Engagement in Spirituality – Meditate Twice A Day; Read a Thought of a Day; Reflect at the end of the day by journaling
• Growth (life purpose)
  • Knowledge Advancement – read a chapter a day of a  relevant book
  • Experience Advancement – try to incorporate a new habit into my life
• Other (these are the things that I add that I want to become part of my daily routine)
  • Stay Updated – get a gist of news every day by reading WSJ, The Economist, TIME, etc.
  • Proper Appearance – take care of my clothes, hair, nails, beard, etc.

Purposeful Actions. This one will vary from day to day, but in general I will add things such as the following:

• errands that I need to do
• actions related to short-term goals
• actions related to long-term goals
• rewards for completing the Perfect Day

Then all I have to do is just organize the above items in an effective manner so that I am sure I complete them every day. Obviously, some items such as nutrition, physical fitness, reading books, or appearance will require more attention and detail than other items, but I do not feel it will add any value to share them with you at this point of time.

After organizing everything into simple routines, you have one final thing left – DO IT. Do what you have written down while trusting yourself that you will get the results that you want.

What Is Your Perfect Day?

Have you ever given advice? Have you had people thank you for your help? However, have you ever followed your own advice that you have given to others? Have you caught yourself doing the exact opposite of what you told your friends? Have people called you a hypocrite? Unfortunately, I have to answer “yes” to all of the above questions. What about you? Answer them honestly before you proceed with the article.

If you answered “yes” to most of these questions, I have great news for you – you have wisdom stored within you that you might not be even aware of. Let us examine why that is the case.

There are couple of important things going on here that we need to explore to understand this completely:

• outside perspective
• oneness
• awareness
• congruency

Outside Perspective. When we give advice to another person, we provide them with an outside perspective on their situation. Outside perspective is usually very valuable and can help the other person deal with their issues effectively. Let us examine why that is. When people are faced with tough life situations, they lack clarity and direction. They seem stuck. The routine takes over people’s lives and they do not know how to get out of it. Then they turn to friends, like yourself, for help. You have the unique ability to look at your friends issues and give them a clear perspective and advice. You seem to immediately understand the action that should be taken. I believe it is because we do not have the emotional connections to the events in other people’s lives, more importantly most of the time we are looking at the situation for the first time and are able to determine the right solution right away. The value of the outside perspective is invaluable.

Oneness. Another piece of the puzzle is oneness. It is my understanding that we are all connected. I believe that all humans are connected because of our experiences in our lives. We all cry, laugh, love, hate, fear, get excited, sad, angry, disappointed, etc. Because of that we are able to connect and understand each other. Therefore when our friends ask us for help, it is likely that their issues and problems is something that we have already experienced or are yet to experience. In a sense, we are giving advice to ourselves! Yet, we have the benefit of added clarity and emotional disconnect to offer the right solution. That is great news because instead of just helping your friend, you are also helping yourself! The only thing we have to do to get the benefit of our own wisdom is to become aware of it.

Awareness. Often times when we give advice, it comes to us naturally. We do not even have to think about it twice. We just seem to know what the other person should do. It does not even matter if we have been in a similar situation before or not. However, we rarely take note of that advice ourselves and next time we get into the situation that our friend was in, we are lost just like they were! How do we solve this dilemma? I, personally, stared writing things down. I bought a journal where I keep solutions to various tough and routine life situations. Whenever, I notice a useful advice that I gave to somebody, I write it down in my journal. Writing things down accomplished a couple of important tasks. First, it helps you store the information for future use. Second, it helps you absorb and remember the information much better. I just recently started doing this and my plan is to have a journal full of ready to use solutions for common and unique life situations. This way I will be always ready to act when I am faced with life.

Congruency. The last piece of the puzzle is congruency. It means following your own advice. If you give advice to your friends and then do not follow it yourself, you will lose credibility. Even though it might have been a proper solution, you not following your own advice will discredit you. This way you might lose a great way to teach yourself and others a great way to handle difficult situations. Moreover, even if you write down your own advice and keep a journal of it, but do not follow what you said you would do, you will just have wasted your time and prolonged your learning process. Help yourself. Follow your own advice. You will be able to build credibility amongst your peers, you will solve your problems quickly and efficiently and you will be able to find any flaws that your advice might have had.

In short, all of us have wisdom of the world contained in us; it is up to us to recognize and use to help others and ourselves. Just trust yourself.