Just recently, I started attending mixed martial arts class. It is truly amazing to learn the things your body can do. Mixed martial arts is all about teaching your body to do things it has never done before. At first it can be difficult, but over time, your learn how to do it the right way.

Probably the best advice I have heard regarding learning some thing new is summed up in the following short phrase: “Slow To Smooth To Fast”.

Whenever you are trying to learn something new, you brain will become confused. It will be doing things, it has never done before or making your body do things it has never done before. It can be quite challenging. But the secret is to just take things slow and learn to do them the right way. Proper execution and form are crucial.

If you do it slow and with proper technique, you will build a solid foundation upon which you will be able to build something amazing. If you start taking shortcuts, you will have a weak foundation, which will not support your dreams.

At first you will be choppy, and things will take you forever to finish. But the more you do it the right way, the faster your body will learn how to handle it. Over time, you will transform into smooth. Your movements might be slow, but they will be smooth and executed properly. Equipped with slow, smooth and proper execution, you will be ready to move on.

You will move to becoming faster. Speed will come with practice. With practice, you will master it and over time you will start asking yourself how could have ever not known how to do this.

Keep this in mind – Slow To Smooth To Fast – in anything you do. It does not matter if you are picking up a new subject at school, learning a new sport, a new instrument or whatever, remember the magic formula and never take shortcuts and you will be surprised how much faster you will get to where you want to go by taking things slow.

America is going downhill for one very simple reason: people seem to not be able to tell the difference between the disease and its symptoms. It almost seems to be common wisdom for people to think that treating a symptom of a disease is the same as treating a disease. In short, if the symptoms do not longer show up, the disease is gone. It’s a mental dis-ease, but nobody seems to think much of it. It almost seems like people are brainwashed into believing into the above truth.

It works so well because of one reason – convenience. America is obsessed with convenience and comfort. The more of it – the better. And for every obsession there are those that cater to it. Except there is one simple thing that is wrong with comfort – it makes you weak. One person at a time it makes a nation weak. We can already see the results of this destructive thinking.

PROBLEM: America is getting increasingly dumb. This is a tough one to swallow, but it is the truth. Instead of increasing the education standards and making students study and think, we lower those standards. Everybody seems to get higher GPAs, pass tests with highers scores and everybody seems to do better.

All of that at the cost of learning and knowing less.

More and more people are going to college with lower quality education. Educational institutions are more concerned about taking a dollar from you or the government than about admitting quality students, which are increasingly rear.In the process, the schools get paid, the private loan companies get paid and the students get screwed.

In the end, you have college graduates who know and do less than high school graduates in less developed countries than the USA. Everybody is so focused on satisfying people’s egos and avoiding hurting their feelings in the short term that they forget that they are hurting not only the individual, but the nation as whole in the long term.

SOLUTION: Increase the standards of education on all levels and let kids fail. We just have to understand that the purpose of an education system is to teach, and not to give passing grades for kids who don’t try. Only by failing you learn. In a sense, we need to deflate the educational system. So what if that students will be getting lower grades? That is not the purpose of education. Education is supposed to be challenging and difficult so that when we come out of school we are actually know a thing or two. Overtime, the students would get used to higher education standards and everybody would be fine. If you ask for more you get for more, if you ask for less then you get less.

PROBLEM: America is getting increasingly unhealthy. It is the results of people reaching out for the pill, falling prey to false advertising about quick weight loss diets and constantly looking for the easy way out. Instead of making the life long choices about their nutrition and exercise, people focus on the quick fix. Even in this day and age where information is abundant, advertising and the dream of the shortcuts seems to get the best of us.

It is convenient.

It is convenient for the food industry, the pharmaceutical industry, the fitness industry, the health-care industry, the insurance industry. Finally, it is convenient for the consumer. Yet, the consumers are the ones who end up complaining about increasing health-case costs. If you haven’t lived under a rock, then you should have heard about the health care reform that is trying to take place. Yet, it is all BS. Reforming the health care system for an unhealthy nation is the same as lowering taxes for the poor.

SOLUTION:Education. Teach people about nutrition and exercise from an early age. Make fitness classes mandatory and physically challenging. Teach people from young age about how to make the right choices about their nutrition and exercise. That is all there is needed to create a healthier and happier America.

That will automatically lower the cost of health-care.

The health care right now is expensive for a reason: there are tons of unhealthy people. That automatically raises the insurance costs because more and more people are falling in the increased risk group. The focus should on prevention of disease, rather than the superficial treatment of it later. It’s no rocket science, and it bothers me seeing people not solving the problem the right way.

In the end, it is all about making the right decisions. However, it is hard to learn how to make the right decisions when nobody around you is making the right decisions.

So in the end, it all comes down to education, experience and values.

The state where America is today is reflective of it’s education, experience and values. That is the real disease – lack of all three. If we were only focused on helping people make the right choices and showing them how to make the right choices, we would not have nearly as many problems as we do today. It is funny, how a nation with so many resources and so much potential can end up in state like this.

What about you? Are you taking care of yourself? Are you treating the disease instead of the symptoms? Answer that go ahead; you might be surprised with what you find. Remember, one person at a time, a nation can become stronger or weaker. It is up to you.

I sometimes wait to write later in the day. Sometimes I do it because I don’t have time in the morning. Sometimes I just wait for inspiration. Inspiration comes from the articles I read or the experiences throughout the day. Well, this article is inspired by an event that happened today.

If you guess that I was pissed off because of the event, then you are right. The only good thing that is going to come out of that negative experience is this article.

The Mistake

In the past, I wrote how disagreement can create value. Many times it provides a different perspective on the same issue and so on. However, arguing has to be done the right way, otherwise it can lead to resentment.

From my experience today, I have come to the following conclusion: before engaging in a conversation and proposing your own perspective on an issue, make sure you understand the other person’s perspective completely.

If you do not take the time to completely understand the other person, then you will just end up insulting the other individual by making assumptions. Also, it is extremely difficult to even talk to a person when you know they did not care enough to research and understand your point of view.

Moreover, when you make assumptions without having the whole picture, you are going into the conversation with a closed mind with a predetermined outcome in your mind. That is the exact reason why you are not able to understand the other person completely to begin with. Your emotions and your prejudice get in the way. Your mind gets closed off before the interaction even starts.

Going to a conversation with a closed mind and a lack of complete information, you are sure to piss somebody off. Even if you won’t piss them off, they will be hesitant to ever talk to you again.

The Solution

So how do you actually avoid making this mistake?

1.Try to figure out why you want to engage in the interaction to begin with. Figure out your intentions first. If your intentions are to prove the other person wrong, then you might as well just drop the idea. However, if you intend to learn a different perspective  and suggest an alternative view to the other person, then that in itself will help you keep an open mind.

2.Do your research before engaging in an interaction. If you have the right mindset, then do your best to understand the different perspective. This will require you leaving the emotions behind you and understanding things for what they are. This will challenge you, but do your best.

3.Clarify before making a point. After completing the above two steps, here comes the crucial one. Summarize the other persons perspective to your opponent to make sure you understand their point of view exactly. This will show the other person that you actually took the time to understand their perspective and did your homework instead of just unloading your views and perceptions on them.

Do the above three steps and you will be able engage in more meaningful connections with other individuals. Try it out and see the magic work. This is part of the art of listening, truly listening. This is the skill that will help you open new doors and deeper understanding about life.

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Image: danorbit

I wrote a guest post for Write To Done, which I would love to share with the rest of you! Before, I go into that, I would like to thank Mary for being so open to my ideas and accepting the article! I felt amazing after she said yes! After all, over 15,000 subscribers received my article. Talk about peer pressure :)

The article talks about the blogosphere as playground: a place where we can have fun and just play for the sake of playing. If you want to learn or remember how to play, then you might to check out the article.

Either way, here are some of the bits from the article:

“I have one question for you: “When did you grow up?”

OKAY, that is actually just the first question. Here’s the rest.

Do you remember that exact moment when you decided to stop having fun and start being serious? Do you know when your careless smile was replaced by a frown? Do you know when you stopped believing in your dreams and decided to become reasonable?

Maybe it was around the time when you stopped playing.
Until that point, the whole world seemed to be your playground!”

If you are curious as to what happens next, read on:

The Ultimate Playground: Blogosphere

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Image: soulholder

I am a huge South Park fan. I have seen every single episode ever made. It has some of the best social commentary about everything and anything. However, one of my favorites of all time is the South Park’s movie “Imaginationland”

Here is a reason behind that. People always question what is real and what is not real. The question comes up very often in discussions about God. Is it real or is it a figment of imagination? It almost always comes down to this: can you prove it?

That’s where it all usually stops because nobody can prove or disprove the existence of God.

As I was reading the book called “The Evolution of God” by Robert Wright, I realized that it does not really matter of it is real or not. What really matters is summed up in the following quote by Kyle:

“General: If I’m not mistaken, you’re the one who bet that leprechauns weren’t real. So why do you care what happens?

Kyle:    Because I- [catches himself] I… Um… because I think… they are real. It’s all real. Think about it. Haven’t Luke Skywalker and Santa Claus affected your lives more than most real people in this room? I mean, whether Jesus is real or not, he… he’s had a bigger impact on the world than any of us have. And the same could be said of Bugs Bunny and, a-and Superman and Harry Potter. They’ve changed my life, changed the way I act on the Earth. Doesn’t that make them kind of “real.” They might be imaginary, but, but they’re more important than most of us here. And they’re all gonna be around long after we’re dead. So in a way, those things are more realer than any of us.”

To be honest, I was blown away. So simple and to the point.

In short, one could say that something is real if it has an impact in our lives. That is all that matters. Weather God is real or not, does not matter. God, at the very least, represents an idea, which can change lives and empower people.

That is all the more reason to respect other people’s view and beliefs and not to try and force ours upon them. What is really real might not ever be understood by anybody. This does not mean that we should try and stop understanding the underlying reality behind our world. No!

The understanding that real things are those that make an impact on our lives gives us a common ground to relate and opens up communication channles with people around the world with different beliefs and worldviews.

In the end, even if we figure out the TRUTH of how this world is put together, would it really change the way we live or the aspiration in our lives? We can look through history looking for an answer and we will see that values of love, honesty, friendship, sacrifice and so on have always been central to our existence.

So next, you are about to challenge somebody else reality think about this simple lesson from South Park and instead of closing the doors you will open them up wide. It does not hurt to explore!

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Image: Bill Doc

Your life is defined by your decisions. Everyday you wake up and you make decisions. That is all life is – continuous decision making process which creates the person that you are today.

Most of the decisions are fairly simple. Every morning when you wake up, you decide what you are going to wear, what you are going to eat and what you are going to do during your day. You probably will never think about many of them twice unless you somehow managed to make a destructive decision too many times, until it developed into a destructive habit.

However, some decisions are perceived as being extremely tough.

What exactly makes a certain decision a tough one? For example, they might have a huge impact on your finances, your relationships, your career, your health, your rest and so on. A tough decision usually comes sprinkled with fear and uncertainty.You will always want to know how things turn out in the end. And you are always going to be looking for the happy ending, right? At least, I do.

Matter of fact, you are probably going to be looking for a happy ending not only for yourself, but for those around you as well. You want your decision to have a positive impact on the people you care about. So far so good? Not exactly.

Many times your concern of how your action is going to affect others is exactly what prevents you from taking the action? Am I right? Think back to some of the following scenarios: you want to quit your job, you want to end a relationship, you want to change your major, you want to confess in something you did wrong, you want to stand up for what you believe in and so on.

How many of those times did you prevent yourself from making a decision because you were thinking the following: “I can’t do that. I don’t want to disappoint this person, I don’t want to hurt them, I don’ want to break their heart” The variations are countless.

Well, I have news for you. Ideally, you should eliminate other people out of the equation when making tough life decisions.

I am making the assumption that you are a decent human being and that you are not taking a decision to purposefully hurt somebody physically, emotionally or otherwise. I am referring to situations where you are following your path in life, where you stand up for your beliefs and your values.

When you are in a tough spot, there are many variables to consider. Sometimes the answers is not clear. The best thing to do then is to eliminate as many irrelevant variables as possible. I am making an argument that other individuals in your life are one of those irrelevant variables.

Many people in life feel like they are responsible for other people’s feelings when making a decision.

I disagree.

You are not one simple bit responsible for how others feel or react to the decisions that you make in life. 9 times out of 10, others will use that knowledge to manipulate you into making a decision that favors them instead of you.

People will react the way they do. There is nothing personal in that. They are just reacting to a situation.

Furthermore, if you assume responsibility for how others feel then you will be doomed to suffer until you choose otherwise. Ultimately, you are tying your own well being to somebody else emotions. You are giving away your power to others by doing that.

Think about it this way. If other people truly cared for you, then they would just let you be and be considerate of what you are doing. Instead, if they are reacting in a manipulative way (crying, being upset, sad, needy, angry, etc) chances are they are not even thinking about what is best for you, but only looking out for their own best interest.

For the sake of illustration let us examine a common situation which I experienced over and over again in college.

I always signed up for classes early in the morning so I could get my day started early. However, my roommates did not have classes until later in the day. Given that fact, they would go out and come back really late: 2AM or 3AM in the morning.

The problem wasn’t that they were going out; it was that I could not rest properly because of loud noise at 4AM. For a long time I tolerated it, thinking: “It’s okay, they want to go out; they have a right to do so. After all they are paying rent too!” However, after a while I realized that I was not getting proper rest and was tired all of the time. Things just didn’t fit. Eventually, I realized that I was not the problem and that my roommates were simply being disrespectful of my rest and just had their best interests in mind.

I eventually started confronting them to the point where it became a serious problem and I ended up moving out.

Even though, the above situation is not as serious it still send the same message: if you want to empower yourself, eliminate other people out of the equation when making tough decisions in life.

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Image: nerovivo

Were you afraid to do something because it seemed too scary? Where you ever paralyzed by inaction because of uncertainty? Have you ever been afraid to change your life?

I will be honest – I have. But, now I am slowly realizing that I do not have to stop myself anymore. I am realizing that I should go for it! I should just do what I desire. I hope that after reading this post you will be able to gain the same insight as well.

DISCLAIMER: Before I start, I have to admit one thing: there are no secrets. The world is out there and you just have to put the effort into understanding it. If you do that, then it will reveal itself in its utter simplicity and beauty.

Repetition of Life

One of the main reasons why life is simple is because it is repetitive. Have you ever heard of the saying: “History repeats itself?” It exists for a reason. The only thing that changes are the tools that we are using to understand this world. The day to day issues are still the same as they have been for thousands of years:

• People are still fighting war;
• People are still killing each other;
• People are still forgiving each other;
• People are still seeking peace and happiness in their lives;
• People are still looking for love and fulfillment;
• People are still looking for the purpose of our existence;
• People are still seeking power, fame and influence.
• Etc.

In the midst of history, the answers have been found and lost over and over again. Each generation had to learn from their own mistakes and then they tried to teach it to others. Yet, the new generation had to experience it on their own in order to learn from it only to discover that the same exact issue has already been solved in the past.

The Secret

If you are like me then you should be jumping from happiness up and down right now! This is awesome!

It means that everything that I am feeling or doing has been done or felt before by somebody else at some point of time in history! Essentially, you do not have to be afraid of anything as everything that you have ever been afraid of has been already dealt with.

A wise person once said that the only way to get rid of fear is to learn so much about it that it does not scare you anymore. Fear is a function of the uncertain and the unknown. If we eliminate the uncertainty and the unknown by learning of what we are afraid of then the fear will wither away.

It is only up to you to find the right people and the right resources to help you educate yourself about the fear and turn it into your strength. It means that you have no real reason to be afraid of doing anything in your life ever again! It might be a humbling experience to realize that you are not that different or unique from others. Yet, at the same time, that exact same feature gives you the ability to learn so quickly from others and truly evolve and become a unique individual who can become a role model for others.

So What?

So next time you are feeling afraid, misunderstood, scared, lonely – STOP IT! Realize that you have the experiences of millions of other people behind you who have gone through the same experiences, faced them, conquered them and became stronger because of them.

Another free secret that I am going to reveal to you: Uncertainty and the unknown does not exist. They are functions of your imagination or your lack of knowledge about your fear. One thing you can do at the very least is to use those deep fears to connect with the people around you. Just remember: the more intimate the feeling, the more universal it really is.

QUESTION: Are you still afraid?

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Picture: Flickr

Habits Run Your Life

Life is simple.For the most part it is run by habits that we acquire over our lives. When I use the term habit I refer to a default way of responding to a reoccurring situation. Habits form because life is repetitive – common things happen over and over again. People act in predictable ways and our brain subconsciously starts responding in a preset way to certain reoccurring events.

Many of us, however, make it difficult by adopting the wrong habits. We start responding in such a way that is destructive to our lives. For example, people form the habits of negative thinking, laziness, pessimism, failure, depression, victim mentality and so on as a default way of dealing with tough situations.

Most of the time, people are not even aware of their destructive habit until somebody tells them so. Habits form because of the environment that we live in and because of the people that we are surrounded by. Humans learn by imitation and if we see something done enough times, we tend to accept as the default behavior to a particular situation. You can image what happens when a person grows up surround by the wrong role models – a ton of destructive habits that can run our lives into shambles.

If we were only able to change those destructive habits into constructive ones our lives would become a lot more simple and much more rewarding. That is all there is to it. Of course: “Easier said than done.”

How To Simplify Your Life

You could take the following steps to simplify your life.

• Become aware of your own destructive habits. This might the hardest step of them all. As I have mentioned before, most of the time we are not aware of us becoming engaged in a destructive action. A simple way to see if the action is destructive is to check if it interferes with your goals or your life purpose or if it slows your growth and development as an individual.

• Become aware of the situations in which you respond in a destructive way. Once you have identified your destructive habits, you will have to closely watch when the habit reoccurs and try to figure out what caused it. For example, if you start smoking after you become stressed out, you will know the stress is the trigger for smoking.

• Make a list. The next step is fairly intuitive. List your destructive habits along with situations that trigger them. Write it down and carry it with you. Glance over it daily so that you become more and more aware of the situations that trigger your destructive responses.

• Prepare a list of constructive responses. Once you have a clear list of the situations that trigger your destructive habits, create a completely new list of constructive habits to replace your destructive ones. For example, try this: instead of going for a smoke when you get stressed out, take a 5-10 walk outside as a new default response. The thing is, habits do not disappear, they must be replaced with a new habit; otherwise your brain will find its own default way of dealing with the situation. After all, habits exist for a reason – they offer us quick solution to common events. So it is in your benefit to make sure that you respond in a positive manner as opposed to becoming your own obstacle.

• Practice. That is how habits are created – by repetition. That is the only way to create a constructive habit that will change your life – practice. The more you practice the less you will have to think about it. Eventually, it will seem to just happen naturally. It might take years, months , or weeks for your brain to form new neuron connections and accept a new way of behaving.

• Reward yourself. This is helpful, but not required to reinforce a new positive habit. Think of something that will help you act one way versus the other. It might things as simple as watching your favorite show, treating yourself to a nice meal, a movie or a spa to reward yourself for your effort.

I Simplified My Life

Here is a very simple example from my own personal life to illustrate the above point. I was addicted to watching cartoons before going to sleep. I just had to watch them, or otherwise I could not sleep. This would keep me up until 1AM or 2AM  every night. Naturally, it would interfere with my work the next day as I would be sleep and tired the whole time.

The situation that caused me to watch cartoons was stress from the whole day. Simple enough. My destructive habit was watching cartoons. Once I had that, I had to write down a new constructive habit – it was meditation. So slowly but surely, I was able to cut out cartoons before going to bed and I would start meditating. It worked!

Now before I go to bed, I meditate. Mediation seems to work like magic and now I can go to sleep on time without wasting precious hours watching cartoons. Of course, because of that I am less stressed out the next day and meditating becomes much easier before going to bed. It’s a win win!

QUESTION: How could you use this technique to simplify your life?

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Photo: Flickr

I went skydiving and I survived. I am here to show and tell and share my experience with you all and encourage you to take on more risks in life which will change you forever!

Why Skydiving

Skydiving seems to be the ultimate challenge for the most people in life. It looks so scary and life threatening, but yet at the same time somehow safe.

When I told people that I am going skydiving, the typical response I heard was: “Why would I want to jump out of a perfectly good plane?” I did not know how to respond to those people. Maybe it was not for them. After all, it was their choice and their life.

I did not want to convince them to join me, but I knew that I had perfectly good reasons for skydiving:

• unique experience of a life time
• an exercise in overcoming the fear of fear
• making a tough decision and sticking with it
• challenging myself
• putting myself out of my comfort zone

Why I Went Alone

To my surprise I heard a couple of people saying that they wanted to go skydiving as well! I was excited! I did not want to do it alone!

Almost all of them told me: “Yea! It’s awesome! Let’s do it!”

Then I would follow up with them and all I would hear would be this: “Yea, I am busy that weekend”; “I had change of plans”, etc. I was disappointed, but I was expecting that. I came to expect for people to say one thing and do a different one. It seems that most of us are just scared of taking risks and rather stick with what we know.

Finally, I realized that if I waited for somebody else to come along , I would never end up go skydiving. I had to do it alone. So I just picked a date, signed up and waited to go skydiving. It felt good, but I was already getting nervous.

I Was Afraid

To be exact, I was afraid. No doubt about that. I had a list of questions and images running through my head:

• Am I going to die?
• If I die, is it going to be painful?
• How am i going to feel when I realize that I am going to die?
• Am I going to break my back?
• Is it safe?
• What if the parachute doesn’t go off?
• What if the plane crashes?
• How much experience does every body else have?
• What are the chances of death?
• What’s the worst thing that can happen?
• etc.

Luckily, I realized that skydiving is just like breathing to some people. I realized that I was not alone in my adventure. The Falling Illini president took me to the skydiving spot. He has done over 200 jumps! I did not even think that anybody would jump out of a plane more than once.

He was able to answer many of my questions and concerns and explained how everything worked. That provided me with some peace of mind. However, words did not mean much and I was as afraid as ever.

Still, I stuck with the plan. While we were driving, it all seemed surreal: I wasn’t really going to go skydiving; this is just a dream! Reality kicked in when we finally arrived and I saw the planes, the parachutes, the field, and people landing from 10,000 feet in the air.

I was not alone. People from all different ages, different levels of experience and different walks of life gathered that day to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

Finally, I paid. The actions were set in motion and there was no turning back. . Slowly but surely, my turn to skydive came. As I was getting ready, I wanted to scream and shout: “Hold up! Can I have some more time? I am not ready! I need more time!” and so on. Yet, things just kept moving and before I knew it I was on the plane. What happened next is history.

I did it!

Lessons Learned

After I landed, I had a lot of time to think and relax. Everything that I just did started to sink in. Here is what I learned from the whole experience:

• Just do it! Just go ahead and do it. If it is something that you want to do, nothing will stop you. All you have to do is decide to do it. Once the first domino falls, the rest will seem seamless and easy. Deciding to do something is key.
• Face the fear. Diving into the unknown, into uncertainty is scary! But the only way to conquer that fear is to face and keep going despite it. Fear is just an emotion saying to you: “You are doing something you have not done before!” That’s great! You are exploring unknown territories within yourself. You are growing!
• Be prepared to go alone. Most people will not face the fear. They will stay where they are. They are not comfortable with the emotion of fear, but you are! That is why there is a chance that you will start alone. It might be discouraging, but rewards in life come with a price.
• You are not alone. You might start out alone, but you will not end up alone. There are other courageous people out there, who are carving their own destiny, their own path in life. Once you leave the ones that are afraid, you will me the ones who are courageous.
• Seek guidance. You are not the first and not the last to travel this new road that you chose. Others have done it. Find them. Find them and ask them questions. Their knowledge will enlighten your path and ease your fears. Uncertainty makes us afraid. We like to know things. So educate yourself about your fear until the uncertainty is gone!
• Prepare for a change. Once you face and overcome your fear, you will change. You will change in ways you did not expect. Your current environment, you current friends and your current lifestyle might not seem appropriate for the person that you have become. But that’s the price of change. Are you willing to pay?

I Changed

Indeed, after skydiving many things changed. Everything seemed so trivial. Skydiving was like whole new world that I have not realized existed. Coming back to “reality” was weird: the sky did not look the same, people did not look the same to me, my fears were not the scary any more.

Most importantly, I became comfortable with uncertainty. I became comfortable with taking risk and facing my fears. I became comfortable with making tough decisions is sticking by them. I felt like I was born all over again.

It’s Your Turn

You do not have to go skydiving to go skydiving. There are so many opportunities in life where you can put yourself at risk, face your fears and realize how trivial they were. You will start looking at a world through a different pair of glasses. Danger will turn in opportunity, fear will turn into growth.

Do you want to go skydiving without going skydiving? If so:

• Go speak in front of a large group of people – you will survive!
• Go ask the girl or guy out – you will survive!
• Stand up for yourself – you will survive!
• Quit your crappy job – you will survive!
• Do what you want to do – you will survive!

Not only you will survive, you will learn and grow and become stronger and stronger with each new experience!

Drop The Victim Mentality

People love to complain, feel helpless and just live in the victim mentality. It puts responsibility out of your own hands and leaves the world at fault. It is easy because you can go on telling yourself that there is nothing you can do about the situation. It is the easy way out. It is also addicting. If you are stuck in that mode of thinking for long enough, you will find yourself depressed with your life spiraling out of control.

It is understandable. Somewhat. Yea, the economy is tough, people do not have jobs, everybody is sad and depressed without any money. What is there to be happy about you ask?

EVERYTHING.

Here’s why! Right now is the best opportunity to appreciate everything that you have and give. Yes! Give! Give when you think that you do not have anything to give. However, understand that you always have something to give. Always! No matter what is going on, no matter how bad the economy is, you can always give something. You can always give your time and your energy to others! That’s right, your time and your energy.

Forget about giving money,things, or food – give yourself. It is the best kind of gift that you can give. You can accomplish that by volunteering!

I was siting at home and complaining that I cannot get a job and how I do not have anything to do and how my life sucks right now. Then, suddenly I realized:

• I do not have a job
• I have nothing to do
• I need experience
• I want to interact and meet others

Go Volunteer

There was only one option left for me. I had to go volunteer! Yes! It all of the sudden made so much sense! And I think that everybody who is unemployed, not sure what to do in life should get up and go volunteer! It is the best thing to do! When times are tough and gloomy go help others by giving yourself for free . There are so many benefits to volunteering:

• you get to help others
• you meet new people
• you gain experience
• you get involved
• you expose yourself to something new
• you spend time with purpose instead of wasting it at home

It is a bit selfish, but sometimes doing things for wrong reasons can lead to do things for the right reasons! So to all the people who sit at home and complain that they can do nothing about their lives, I have answer – go help others! This way you shift your focus from scarcity to abundance. Even when you think you have nothing else to give, give yourself! If you are serious and want to get started there are a couple of great places to do that:

• http://www.idealist.org/
• http://www.volunteermatch.org/

There are opportunities for a variety of individuals with different sets of skills. Are you a recent college graduate, a high school graduate? Are an expert in finance, accounting, marketing, etc? There are opportunities for you.

For example, I am interested in financial planning. I went to those sites listed above and there are plenty of opportunities for financial planners. This way, I will not be wasting my time sitting at home, I will be able to go out and meet new people, I will gain experience in financial planning, I will do something to help others, I will make new connections. I choose life of abundance and leave the life of victim behind me.

There are reasons to only go out and volunteer TODAY! What are you waiting for? What is your excuse? Go out there and help others especially in such a time of need for everybody!

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Image: Flickr